I’m really pleased that on the blog today I have a guest post from an incredibly lovely and hardworking father of three girls, a four year old and eighteen month old twins. He wishes to remain anonymous and so I will just refer to him as herecomethegirlsdad. He needed a lot of encouragement so be gentle…
On Wednesday night I watched the program One Born Every Minute for the 1st time. I won’t comment on the one eijit who clearly wasnt ready to be a dad. Instead I’ll focus on the birth scene. It was like watching Alien except the creature was bursting out of the woman’s foo foo and not her belly. All in all, I’m really pleased I missed seeing that firsthand with my girls.
I won’t lie to you, I found the whole pregnancy thing surreal. I’ve got a mild phobia of pregnant women. I reckon this stems from being in my mum’s bed when I was 4 the night her waters broke. Although I don’t remember it, I have a feeling it has left deep scars. Deep.
Looking back to our first pregnancy, its fair to say I spent the whole time dizzy, panicked and confused. Not a cool look in hindsight. I probably could have been more supportive but I was too busy trying not to lose the plot entirely! I realised our life was changing forever; I liked our life and wasn’t sure if I was ready.
First time around the birth was stressful because of the emergency c-section. All very dramatic. I don’t like drama. I just felt like a spare part. The midwives attention was, quite rightly, on the mum. Mine was very much a supporting, bit part role. With the twins we had a planned c section – a wholly more dignified process. You have an appointment: you go in and you come out with babies. Bostin’.
This might sound odd but from my perspective its hard being out with a baby or toddler in public by myself. I can really feel people staring at me. Folk still think its odd when they see a man looking after a baby. Now with twins that’s magnified as EVERYONE stares at you.
Big kids are easier. They cry. You ask them what’s wrong. They tell you. Babies cry. You ask them what’s wrong. They cry more.
I felt relieved when I found out the twins were girls. I know what to do with them. I must admit getting the odd pang not having a boy though. I’ve had to give my star wars and transformer figures away to my nephews. I won’t get to read them Batman comics – I know I could but despite what anyone says, it’s not the same.
And would I do it again? Don’t be so *****ng ridiculous. We’re horribly outnumbered, our belts can’t go any tighter, we haven’t slept properly for years and our house is at bursting point as it is. Plus if we did have any more it’d be another girl. Or two. Or three. Most of all though, I feel our family is complete the way it is. Although hard work, we have three extremely beautiful and lovely daughters that I am thankful for everyday. I just wish they’d sleep.